I am pretty relaxed when it comes to potty training. As a SAHM I figured I'll either be training me to take them on time or I'll wait until they can do it on their own without prompting and accidents. I trust my memory about as much as I trust a young 3 year old boy's bladder.
When Biggest was 2 he expressed interest in the potty for about 2 weeks. It was very exciting and I ran out and got the potty training how-to books and the potty chair and we made a potty train for reward stickers. Then he lost interest and I relaxed and began to wait for the interest to arise again. By the time he was 3 and a half I could tell he was definitely in control of his bodily functions. I started to bring up the subject but he still was not interested in the least. However, he hated being changed so I reminded him that the sooner he started using the potty the sooner he would not have to submit to diaper changes. We tried pull ups but as he would use them like a diaper - without caring whether or not he had gone I figured it was pointless to spend the extra money on them. We tried the "feel and learn" diapers that hold the wetness closer to the skin so that he might be uncomfortable enough to want to train. It gave his sensitive skin the worst case of diaper rash I have ever seen.
We were one month away from his fourth birthday when I decided enough was enough. I knew he had the body control and something he said made me realize he knew it too. We went down to the store and he picked out 2 packs of very cool underwear.
The next morning I took him in to the bathroom, took off his diaper and put him on the toilet. Before I horrify you with what took place next let me say that this has always been my "strong willed child". He will fight me on anything for the sake of winning. From eighteen months until recently, everything was a fight (although the fight still crops up periodically). If I said to do it, he said no. Even if it was something he wanted. He wanted control over his own little life. Even giving him control over small areas of his own things made him a tyrant in all other areas. I have always reminded myself that these qualities will one day make him a good leader, if we stay the course and train him properly now...
So, back the bathroom... I took off his diaper and told him it was time to potty train. I told him that when he was done on the potty he could put on his underwear and we would do this together. I would set the timer and help him remember to try to go periodically. I reassured him that I knew he could do it and that even if there were accidents it was okay, we had lots of new underwear and it wouldn't take long to learn. He was furious. Sitting on the potty he demanded his diaper. I, very cheerfully, told him that he was a big boy and that he didn't need his diaper. He threw the underwear out of the bathroom while yelling, "Bad underwear". I handed him the underwear back and admonished him that the underwear was not bad and that he needed to at least give it a try. He threw the underwear again and again yelled at it. I calmly told him that as he did not need diapers anymore his choices were to sit on the potty all day, run around naked or to put on the underwear and go about his day. I then told him to think about it and let me know what he wanted to do. I then turned around and walked out of the bathroom.
He sat on the toilet yelling and screaming, "Bad Underwear, Bad Mommy!" After 45 minutes of yelling he said, "Okay Mommy, I'll wear my underwear now." Poor little guy couldn't walk right away. His legs were asleep from sitting so long on the potty. I cheerfully came in (without mentioning the rantings of the previous 45 minutes) and helped him put his underwear on. We exclaimed all about how neat they were and what a good job he had done picking them out. I reminded him that if he felt the need to pee to let me know and we would run to the potty together. He didn’t need my help at all. He kept that underwear dry all day and used the potty whenever he needed to, on his own. I was so proud of him. That night we put the diaper back on and discussed how it was only for nighttime and that the next day he could wear his underwear again.
The next morning we went back to the bathroom and he sat on the potty. I brought him his underwear and it started all over again. This time he screamed, ranted and raved, "Bad Underwear, Bad Mommy" for 30 minutes. The next day it took 15 minutes. By the 4th day he got up and put his underwear on with no problem at all. Within two weeks he was also in underwear at night and my boy NEVER had an accident. Not one.
This is on my mind as Littlest is quickly approaching 3 1/2. He is showing the same signs of readiness. We're not pushing too much as we still have a long drive to California ahead of us in 8 weeks but I know once we are home the training will begin. Fortunately, Littlest has never been as argumentative as Biggest. Hopefully it won't be quite the battle, but I am ready.
3 comments:
Every child is unique. Some flush their training pants down the toilet, some put them on the first time and never look back. Littlest will be a fun one when he gets there!
Thank you Mary! I take that as a huge compliment. For those parents out there who have never read Mary P., I highly recommend her (and not because she just gave me a compliment:-P)!
I was very luck with our daughter. She potty trained right away and never had an accident. I went out and bought her a stack of pretty lacy underware, threw away the diapers and never looked back. To date, 22 years later, she still has not had an accident. lol
Post a Comment